Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about the Mindset of an Artist and how it affects his/her life and work. On Youtube one can find countless videos on art techniques: basic ones, complex and original, inventive, etc. As artists we are grateful to have those videos and more than appreciate the time individual creatives take to post them and share their knowledge.
But what about the “behind the scenes”? What about the angels and daemons that accompany us throughout our creative lives and possibly before and also after?
It seems to me that the difficult part of being an artist is not the acquisition of skills, learning to develop ideas, put our work out for the world to see. The really hard part is “the baggage”. Not the suitcase filled with tubes of paint or the boxes carrying the stone and the marble. By “the baggage” I mean the psychological, spiritual, emotional chains that tie us to a childhood, a later trauma, an inherent characteristic (Karma?) of our souls.
I also call them Angels and Daemons. The latter would be that little guy/girl sitting on our shoulder while we paint, chisel, or play an instrument. That strident or quiet voice that is relentless, that will not abate unless we spend a good amount of time “working on it”.
So let’s talk about The Mindset. There is much to say about it and this post is just the first, perhaps my way of finding catharsis through writing, sharing, hoping to find kindred souls who will argue, ask questions, contradict, accept, or just nod.
Let’s start with Intuition. It is actually an Angel, but what happens when we are not in touch with it? That’s when we don’t trust it, cannot hear its voice or choose not to. It’s when we give priority to the brain and not the heart, to the loudest of voices rather than the faintest and most truthful. When this happens, one of the Daemons resulting from it is Second-Guessing. We second-guess our ideas, our inspiration, our choices, even our play. We do not trust the first burst of inspiration and, for that matter, not the last, either. We make countless changes, hoping that the next one will reflect the beauty or the expression we seek. We are never satisfied when staring at a creation we struggled with for the nth time.
Can we love what comes out of us if we do not love ourselves? Can we trust our creative intuition if we don’t trust our skill, talent, artistic criteria, etc.?
Eventually, as artists, we will and do create what we love. But at what price! Not with the pure, unadulterated joy creativity is supposed to be and bring (yes, it’s also hard work), but only after an emotional roller coaster of possibly berating ourselves, feeling depressed, hopeless. And we take those feelings home from the studio, hang our coat by the door, envision the hours with family when we may feel more whole, perhaps, because the creative intuition may now be asleep.